Crushed, But Pressing Forward
Greetings,
“The righteous cry out, and the Lord hears them; He delivers them from all their troubles. The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. A righteous man may have many troubles, but the Lord delivers him from them all; He protects all his bones, not one of them will be broken. Evil will slay the wicked; the foes of the righteous will be condemned. The Lord redeems His servants; no one will be condemned who takes refuge in Him.” Psalm 34:17-22
Went to court today for the final time concerning my divorce. Everything was agreed upon and the marriage is over once the judge signs off on it. In some ways I feel brokenhearted and crushed in spirit. I mean who can just walk away from a 31 year relationship without a great sense of loss? I married my first love when I was a 19 year old boy and now this 49 year old man grieves that loss. However, I am not hopeless and without love. No Jesus has filled the gaping hole in my heart with a new love and an appreciation for Him and His master plan.
I cried out and The Lord heard me and He is delivering me from my sadness. I feel closer to Him than I ever have in my life and I literally feel reborn. Only He knows what is next for me in this life and I am looking forward to whatever that may be. After all it is all about the journey and what happens along the way. The destination is decided and set by Him and lies before me. I am buckled up and ready for the ride. However, I do not travel alone because I believe that He has called another to walk alongside me. In spite of my shortcomings Father continues to bless and lead me. For that I am very thankful.
So it comes down to this: “Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead. I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.”
Love and…..
Kirk Out !
notesfromthebridge 
So very sorry Chris.
In a weird way, you will most likely find that you have no emotional reaction, if any reaction other than “oh, so there it is” when you received the papers that the judge signs. More than likely, you have been going the the loss/grieving process already and the signed papers will be insignificant compared to the over all loss that has occurred.
I expected a sense of relief or sadness when I received divorce papers….but nothing like that happened.
I just marked the date in my head and continued on with what I was doing.
Really sorry Chris, you sound positive though and aware of His presence. At times like this when we are aware rather than wonder where are you God, wow that’s really everything. He’s so easy to recognize when everything’s great but when we see Him in the tough realities of life there’s no greater blessing. Those are the true miracles of God. Sensing His peace in the midst of turmoil. I pray you’re aware of Him each step of the way. God Bless
Sorry Chris. I had forgotten the exact date of the court. All you can do is press on. YOu have that in you, and you have a great cloud of witnesses there, and you have some pretty good friends who will help where they are able, and who pray for you and your family. You are healthier than you have been in years, and God is working in you, through you, inspite of you, and because of you. Just walk daily knowing that God has enveloped the situation in his grace.
I think we also have to keep in mind that although she has been silent, Lori has hurts with this too, and we need to be praying for her, praying for grace and strength there too. She is a wonderful person, and a believer also.
My heart goes out mostly for the “kids”. But especially Caleb and Lydia. My prayers really focus there.
I just know that what Satan has meant for evil, to kill, steal and destroy with, God can, and does use to bring healing, restoration.
hugs to you all!
Thank you…..Lori
Loved this entry Chris! I too have lived this devastating experience and have entered into the joy that awaited me on the other side. Now as I find myself in the midst of another trial all of those hopes and fears cry out for my attention.. Our rest is in Christ alone – so let us hope for tomorrow, yet while it is still called ‘today’, let us strive to enter into His rest! Amen?
– Kenny
Praying for you this morning, Chris. Relationships are at the core of our humanity. In relationship with others, we are sometimes blessed and othertimes deeply, deeply wounded. Tlove you, brotherhe danger, at for myself, is to allow the damaged relationships reflect upon my relationship with Christ, when it actually should be the other way around (we love because He first loved us – 1 Jn 4:19). As a brother in Adam, I grieve with you the pain of loss, and as a brother in Christ, I lift you up to God in prayer, asking Him to strengthen, encourage and surround you with His loving and glorious presence. Love you, brother.
“But if the Spirit of him that raised up Jesus from the dead dwells in you, he that raised up Christ from the dead shall also bring to life your mortal bodies by his Spirit that dwells in you. Therefore, brethren, we are debtors, not to the flesh, to live after the flesh. For if you live after the flesh, you shall die: but if you through the Spirit do put to death the deeds of the body, you shall live. For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, they are the sons of God. For you have not received the spirit of bondage again to fear; but you have received the Spirit of adoption, by which we cry, Abba, Father. The Spirit himself bears witness with our spirit, that we are the children of God: And if children, then heirs; heirs of God, and joint-heirs with Christ; if so be that we suffer with him, so that we may be also glorified together.” (Romans 8:11-17 KJ2000)
Flame ON, my brother!
Buzz
Hello Chris, I have seen some wonderful changes in you in the time I have known you. I had seen you in the grocery store, and because of how we know each other, I was afraid to approach you, (not only because of that affiliation but also, because I consider you a mentor, one I admire), anyhow, back on task, lol, you spoke right up. To be honest it was on a day when I too was feeling low, as I too am going through a divorce, although I want mine, there is a sense of failure I feel. I can not seem to move past that, I pray daily for peace on that issue, but it is so darn hard. Thank you Chris for being there that day, you made me smile, and you helped me remember what all my long days at work, studying, and meetings are all about. Thank you for sharing these words you have today, because my custody hearing is coming up next week, then the, six month cooling off period will follow in roughly two weeks, through your words, I have gained some strength.
Ann, once again you are far too kind. Thanks for the encouragement and I will be praying about your custody hearing. Love, Christopher
All religons promote death and rebirth so it must be a good idea…