Grief And Loss
Greetings,
“Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will live, even though he dies; and whoever lives and believes in me will never die. Do you believe this?” John 11: 25-26
Seems I am in the middle of a difficult season for me. This past week two dear friends of mine died and they were both only 58 years old. I have no doubt that both of them are with Jesus now. I grieve deeply, but not as those without hope.
Tommy O and I met at Jesus People USA in Chicago 14 years ago. I also shared his campsite at the Cornerstone Festival for the past 13 years. Tommy was a brilliant musician. He could play anything with strings. Tommy was humble and wise and he could say more in one sentence than most could in a whole page. He loved Jesus, his wife, son and friends. Tommy served Jesus and the church for many years. And oh how Tommy could make the best deep fried turkey one could ever eat. He died quietly in his sleep from inoperable bowel cancer. Right now all I know is that I miss my friend.
Paul W. and I served together the last 10 years in our communities ministerial association. He was the associate pastor at the Sturgis missionary church. He was a very gifted administrator and he helped organize many big projects, that brought together many of our communities local fellowships, like Thanksgiving meals for the needy and corporate unity services. Paul was always very supportive of me in my struggles with PTSD. Paul also recognized the value of relational fellowship and was always eager to hear about what our housechurches were all about. His smile could light up a room as he talked about Jesus. Paul leaves behind a wife and three grown children. I am glad to say that he was my friend. He will surely be missed in our community. The reason for his death… complications from the flu.
Friends play an important role in our lives. We all need love, support and accountability. True friends provide all three. ”Iron sharpening iron” happens most often in true friendships. I do not require that my friends agree with me concerning every issue. Paul and I definitely did not share the same theology where it comes to the church, but we were still friends due to our mutual attachment in Christ. I recognize my need for sisters and brothers in my life. I desire friendship and I thank Jesus for everyone that He has places in my life.
58 is much too young to die. In 7 years I will be 58. I do not fear death, but recent events have made me think about my own mortality. At this age any regrets that I may have had are now washed away by the blood of Jesus. I now face life head on. Please pray for those who are grieving today?
Love and ……
Kirk Out !
Chris, Sorry to hear about your loss of these two brothers. 58… my grandfather lived used to quote, “It is appointed for a man to live thee score and ten years and if by reason of strength four score.” In less than two years I will be seventy and the rest after that is a bonus, the way I see it, so hang in there, my brother.
In all honesty I still find it hard and sad when people I know pass away, yet I have still yet to lose anyone who is truly dear to me such as a close friend in the body of Christ. This may be due to my strong belief and adherence to relational fellowship or maybe just because I have so few close friends. Their is a cost in obeying God and the gospel and that often includes being rejected by the status quo or today’s professing world through religious institutions.
We should commend Christopher and those like him who despite some differing beliefs have not rejected in wholesale the true believers still holding to their chains through institututions. I can’t speak for Chris, but I was once one of those people “who knew not what he did” – how I hurt myself, limited my own growth and dishonored Christ through those choices. In due season our Father brought me enlightenment and I have soared freely ever since. That should be our prayer for all God’s people still in their chains. I’m grateful Chris found a way in which he could interact and serve among others who shared the same Savior in his local area. That’s one way in faithfully discerning the local body and living it out without making compromises.
When I think about it, the closer one’s relationships are the more risk and heartache we’ll eventually suffer. One suffers little when these relationships are superficial, one suffers greatly when these friendships are deep and connected. As those professing and living Jesus and Him crucified, we all ought to know God’s heart in this matter and how He poured His life into others risking all.
If I truly love you than my care will not be limited to a particular christian religion, a set of beliefs or always agreeing upon everything with you. God’s standards don’t change, but I change, as I’m willing to deny my own rights and desires for others in need.
“He who believes in Me will live, even if he dies; and whoever lives and believes in Me will never die. Do you believe this?”
Yes I do. Without this hope and anchor our pain and sadness can never truly be healed but only concealed under this world’s empty offerings of the same.
Our healing and hope as Christians are real and lasting in Him, for He paved the way through sufferings and triumphed over the grave.
Chris, I will pray for you and Tommy’s family today. I am 58, my father passed away at 56, 21 years ago. Weighing our own physical mortality is very valuable, as it keeps us focused and centered as those who are mature should be. God bless you my dear friend.
Marc
Love you, Chris. We do disagree on many things spiritual these days, but I know that doesn’t mean we both wouldn’t watch each others back, and walk the extra mile for each other. I’m with you, man, until the end. Your brother,Martin,
Grieving with you, Chris. Not for the ones who left, but for those who feel their vacancy. Love, “BK”